Courage and Confidence

Courage is a word we don't discuss anymore as a society.  And it's something we should talk about because it's directly related to our well-being.

My definition of courage is the ability to express yourself and speak up despite feeling anxious, scared, overwhelmed, or uncertain.  Classic examples of courage come from the military (facing down bullets and such).  More modern times shows of non-life threatening courage are speaking up online, reading the comments section, putting your foot down with your child, leaving a bad relationship, among many other situations.  

If you can't speak up in business meetings, have a tough conversation with a loved one or co-worker, express yourself online without feeling assaulted, or jump into a new health routine because you're are anxious about new things, then you can't really live your life.

Not being able to work through the anxiety, fear, or the unexpected causes us to lose momentum.  To feel unconfident and demotivated.  To feel insignificant.  To lose our voice.  

When we feel like we can speak up, share ourselves and our ideas, that our voice is important, then we can feel confident we are living into our full potential.

It’s like when you drive, and somebody cuts you off dangerously.  Sometimes we don’t hit the horn.  Later you feel a bit anxious, and grumpy because you didn’t express the close call.  You can get caught in your head, and it can ruin your day.

Other times you hit the horn at the appropriate time.  It feels good to say “Hey, you came close to hitting me” with a beep.  The issue is settled, and you can go about your life.  (This is also assuming you are not being a total jerk about using the horn.)

What’s the difference between action and inaction?  Being aware of the need to speak up, to be a little confrontational, and confident you will be ok.

So how do you bring more courage into your life?  No matter if you are a shy introvert, or seasoned extrovert, these ideas can help you feel more courageous in your day to day life.  

1. Use confident body posture - Stand up straight, look people in the eyes when you talk to them, breath through your diaphragm 
2. Coach thy self!  - When you know you will have a big meeting, or discussion, coach yourself through how you want to feel, how you want others to feel, and how it would go perfectly.
3. Start small, build up to more difficulty -  If you are shy, say ‘ello to strangers.  If you have an important presentation, practice in the room without anyone in it before etc.
4. Share your ideas, feelings, and art more.
5. Practice practice practice.